Sunday, June 18, 2006 at 11:13
Happy Birthday Yu Ching
okie... so ytd was yu ching's bday.. 21st alr... so old.. time has really past.. anw.. morning went sp for nadia's fyp tingy.. arnd 1230 end.. went payalebar.. supposed to bring mandy to the comfort driving center at ubi.. coz tat day buy kerosene went n i tot i saw it.. den end up i bring her walk one big round cant find.. sorry abt it.. den after tat went home.. watched lost2... bath go out again.. went marina find yc they all.. they playing bowling b4 i arrived... den reached arnd 7 den go eat the steamboat... ala... eat until very full... den after tat 9 like tat eat cake.. eat finish we 4 guys play bowling.. hahhaa.. damn funny.. first game is all single den i n yc one lane.. den we both get 90 den weilin get 75... den jj 50 plus or 60 plus nia.. ala.. can hit hundred de lor.. juz tat first 2 frame throw 0/0 - 1/0... hahhaa.. ala.. long time nv play wad.. need find momentum.. hahaha.. den 2nd round we play share game.. i share wif jj.. haha... den i go use curl.. den weilin oso learn.. end up alot of chances wasted.. hahhaa.. den they won.. 111 to 105... den after tat rush back home.. coz huiting late le.. by 1030 supposed to reach home we 1130 at dhoby ghaut nia.. hahhaa.. sorry hai u kena nagging/scolding.. den came home.. slpt.. anw my fingernails got 3 spoil liao.. one broke.. omg.. gg to cut all lata.. hahhaa.. tats abt all la... btw.. elaine, it was nice of u to tink of me.. sumtimes i do tink of u too bud i juz dun make it known.. it was nice to recieve ur sms ytd.. =).. today will juz stay home maybe afternn start doing assignments le.. tml still nid go sch do histo ppt n oc ppt... after tat gg s'pore museum wif clar... for her gems tingy.. den after tat dunoe doing wad la.. broke liao.. hahhaa
so i had a dream on fri nite.. it was those dreams tat i can rmb alot of details... basically.. it was a sad dream.. first.. my very the good fren jeremy wong apparently will killed sumhow in the dream.. den there's tis fren of ours tyy who claim he was responsible for his death.. tis part i dunoe for wad.. hahaha.. den there's tis person who oso claim she was responsible for his death.. den like tis like tat till i was comforting her.. gav her a hug.. a hug tat felt so real.. n yet i noe it might juz nv happen... haiz... den dunoe how the dream ended.. or rather i woke up on purpose after the hug so tat it ends there... its a sad dream... den last nite oso had 2 dreams.. first one abit forget liao.. bud oso got the person i hugged in the first dream... den second one was abt dunoe where.. at a soccer match or sumting.. den zidane was on the pitch kicking about.. den i wanted to get his signature... den when reach the pitch he alr missing.. den i ran into the dressing rooms look for him.. den he sign le den shake hand n go back.. den the point of tis dream is i tot of how wonderful it will be if i could juz giv his signature to my elder sis for her bday.. afterall she's in france.. i noe she loves zidane.. n well.. it will juz nv come true... tats all...
footnote: dreams do not come true
so there r tings tat i may be aware of.. there r tings tat i may not be aware of.. those tat i noe of contributes to evry single part of my actions.. tings tat i do... tings tat i do not noe of may contribute to the tings tat i do not do... sumtimes.. noeing too much mite not be good... bud yet we as humans always wan to noe evryting.. we juz cant stand noeing tat we do not noe sumting.. wad can i say.... all i do noe is tat at the moment.. nth is fixed... when i go here.. i feel tis way.. when i move away.. i feel another way... its not becoz i'm conflicting.. its becoz tats the way humans work..
so as i went back to sp ytd morning.. tings such as fyp, politics n alot more came back to hit me... i tot of it.. n i realised tat there's 2 different planets out there.. one in sp where i'm arnd ppl who r all so old n academic minded... n nchs where evryone is so young n frenship minded.. i believe i cant continue running betwn both planets anymore.. its time i make a decision.. to remain on a planet n maybe ignore the other.. yet life is cruel as such tat i do not even hav to make a decision... coz i cant let go of the poly planet.. i juz hav to complete wad i started.. get my diploma.. for nchs.. i guess its still okie to let it go since all i hav there attached to me r juz bonds.. relationships... whereby i hav a covalent bond over at the poly planet.. i cant let go of my diploma without having gotten it.. sure ppl will tell me do wad i wan.. i wish i could.. i wish i could forget all abt the diploma.. forget all abt poly.. afterall there's not much left on tat planet tat makes me wana stay.. bud i cant.. wad abt my future?? nchs doesnt giv me any assurance of my future at all.. do i go arnd interviews for jobs saying i was once an instructor for rcy for 10yrs?? who's gona care?? n when i do leave the poly planet nxt yr.. i got a whole new planet called the NS planet looking for me.. tat juz means tat its time i let go of the nchs planet.. so i guess it pretty much looks to me tat my time is up.. or it was all along up.. i juz dint let go.. so goodbye nan chiau.. goodbye all my wonderful juniors there.. goodbye people.. it was terrific while it lasted.. good bye.
